Owen is 20 months old today!
This 20-month-old-thing makes the big TWO seem so close. I even brought up the topic of birthday party themes a few days ago. My little baby boy is almost 2 years old? How can that be! But he's changing so much - he's saying SO MANY new things every day. He just started flying through the colors, which a week ago he didn't even acknowledge. We get him to count - sort of - and for some reason the number "2" is by far his favorite. He's having a great time at daycare with his friends in the big kid toddler room. Sometimes he even eats his fruits and vegetables (not often). He's currently fighting off an ear infection and the potential return of brochialitis - this nasty wheezing cough thing - but he's been so good about taking his medication and his breathing treatment. He actually gets upset when we take the breathing thing away. Funny little man. What else entertains him? He is obsessed with Cars and Toy Story. Elmo is still his favorite best friend, but these days he also is a big fan of Handy Manny and Chuggington. We were at the aquarium today - "hi fishes!" - Owen had a great time. Time is flying by!
I can't believe that the summer is almost over and fall is almost here. What will we do without the pool on the weekends?? But I find myself looking forward to fall things like Halloween, the leaves changing colors, the weather getting cooler, Thanksgiving, our trip to Disney, and of course Owen's birthday and Christmastime.
A week from Tuesday is the 1 year anniversary of my Mom's death. It is unreal to me that it's been a year already, a year since her terrible disease won. It's been a tough year. Incredibly hard. I find it tragically unfair that she is not around to see Owen grow - she would love it SO much. The grief is just overwhelming sometimes. But now, it almost feels like my new 'new year' is August 24 - and I'm hoping that the new year will allow me to do more of what she wanted, which is to remember the good times instead of the bad. That's what I'm going to try my best to do. I certainly don't want to forget (which wouldn't be possible anyway) and I want Owen to know her name and to recognizer her face. It's a matter of finding the balance so I can keep her memory alive yet also be able to carry on living without drowning in a constant sea of grief. If you know what I mean, you understand. I hope you don't.
This all connects to some of the fall and winter events I am looking forward to. I am excited for Christmas this year - last year was so very hard - I want to make it a very special one for Owen and our family. We are finally feeling more settled in our house and our jobs and our life here. I am hoping I can find a way to make it wonderful for our little family while also loving my Mom and remembering all the beautiful holidays I spent with her. Owen deserves it! He brings us so much happiness and joy every day - we are so lucky to have him in our lives.
Anyway, that's all for now... enjoy the last few weeks of summer. x
